While both are totally invalid "certifications" and essentially unimportant
in the job market, BOTH the MCNGP and the MCSBNGP+++ have been regarded by
the unindoctrinated as "worthy", at least of an initial inquiry. It is only
upon following up that we're full of something does it become apparent that
we are better than everyone else.
This suggests that currently non-existant certifications may be useful in
increasing one's perceived value to stupid hiring managers.
Consider the possibility... An overflow of "bogus" non-certification
certifications on the market would cloud the vision of these human orange
cones and hurtle MS's certification division into disarray.
Consider... If there really were an MCSB, an MCSC, MCSD, MCSF, MCSG, MCSH,
MCSI, et al, and you had one on your love me wall, and the hiring manager
was too lazy to really look into it (and they usually ARE), your resume
might move to the top of the stack simply because you have more four letter
words than the next guy.
As Microsoft has not specifically created these varied certifications, they
cannot claim "ownership" of the initials, and as such, it would not be
illegal to create them. If one were to create these certifications, what one
could do is have a test for each, albeit one that is dramatically simpler
than the . In this way, the certifications would become fair to stupid
people, and the playing field would be leveled for entering the job market.
The credibility of any given certification would require further analysis
and examination on the part of the hiring manager, and the total cost of
hiring an MCSwhatever would increase because it would become more difficult
to separate reality from fiction.
What steps would be required to make this process so it would not be easily
discernable as "bogus"? What steps would be required to maintain the
legality of the process? How many should we make?
The certifications MCSB, MCSC, MCSD, MCSF, MCSG, MCSH, MCSI, MCSJ, MCSK,
MCSL, MCSM, MCSN, MCSO, MCSP, MCSQ, MCSR, MCSS, MCST, MCSU, MCSV, MCSW,
MCSX, MCSY, MCSZ, unless otherwise reserved, are (c)opyright 2005, Rob
Lindman. All Rights Reserved. Patent Pending.
The certifications MSCB, MSCC, MSCD, MSCF, MSCG, MSCH, MSCI, MSCJ, MSCK,
MSCL, MSCM, MSCN, MSCO, MSCP, MSCQ, MSCR, MSCS, MSCT, MSCU, MSCV, MSCW,
MSCX, MSCY, MSCZ, unless otherwise reserved, are (c)opyright 2005, Rob
Lindman. All Rights Reserved. Patent Pending.
Microcephalic S. Bob
MCSBNGP+++/MSC*/MCS*/N@!?
(republication rights granted upon request)