The
Mon Jun 13 04:40:10 CDT 2005
> Simon Geary wrote:
>>
http://tfl09.blogspot.com/2005/06/microsoft-ditches-mcse-credentials.html
>>
>> Can anyone comment on this?
> Thomas <doctordns@gmail.com> wrote in message >
> Yes. I was asked to pull it by Microsoft.
[....]
>I had to pull that entry too.
>
> My apologies.
>
> All I can now say is to 'watch this space'. The details about the
> over-arching certification, the MS Certified Architect, are now out.
> Additional changes will be revealed in due course
I'm sure you'll agree, this proposed course of action on the part of
Redmond's "finest citizens" almost conclusively answers recent questions
with regards to the perceived value of the various Microsoft certifications
and exposes the genuine null value thereof, while demonstrating the "pull
the rug out from under you" approach you can expect when dealing with our
favorite "law abiding, ethical corporation for distributing potentially
worthless paper for your I love me wall".
Consider the following possibilities, which I challenge Microsoft to
categorically deny with their upcoming "certification":
0. Before I begin: If you don't work at Microsoft, it's not your job to
dispute this, and you probably have a lot of studying to do in order to be a
paper slave, so I recommend not wasting your time. I'll abuse you to my
ultimate amusement if you disregard this and try to take the bullet. Let
Microsoft fight their own battles.
1. Any value the MCSE once may have had, it is now potentially devalued,
because a new certification is going to "raise the psychological bar" that
the imbecilic hiring managers (human mongers) will look for when structuring
their exclusion queries. If you are currently in process towards your MCSE,
the end of the arduous certification highway is now to be extended further.
If you were previously comfortable in your position as an MCSE, you now have
to scramble in order to obey and participate in Microsoft's apparent PDCC
program - aka the Perpetual Dangling Carrot Contest.
2. It's been identified that tests purely based on technical skills do not
genuinely assist companies to find employees who can solve problems that
aren't in the textbook, and if you've ever been in the IT business, you
know, all the problems aren't in the textbook. Anyone can pass a multiple
choice test because these tests are subject to the same mathematical
principals as those used in casinos, long known to statusticians,
mathematicians, and Dr. Phil, and you may be able to guess your way through
it. And of course we know that there are ways to cheat this sort of system,
with the miscellaneous "brain dumpers" and "communists" floating about
proving themselves worthy of terms we deem derogatory, which we should
probably reserve for when we reference Microsoft and our immediate families.
3. The proposed addition of a peer review is HIGHLY SUBJECTIVE and is not
cleanly meritorious, and as such will probably allow Microsoft to reject you
for nearly any reason they choose, so they can keep you locked into a system
of paying for documents that lose their value each time Microsoft constructs
another one, and maximize on the number of opportunities to make you fail at
their financial gain. This of course will suit me just fine, because I have
a service where I will fail for you AND take the blame, and as long as
Microsoft continues to perpetuate the carrot dangling, I'll always have
customers.
4. Peer reviews can represent problems, because unlike automated testing
systems, they involve human interactions and human prejudices. The
assessment of one's technical capabilities on the part of another individual
is often extremely personal and as such, destined to be wrought with peril
and suffering. Consider: "It was because I was fat and the assessor doesn't
like fat people". In general, I'm certain that you can expect that there
will be racial and sexual, age, "orientation", appearance, etc, ad
infinitum, related legal problems to contend with which may originate from
people who fail and believe the reason for this failure to be attributable
to personal feelings, expectations, perceptions, and communications
breakdowns typical when dealing with humans. This can and probably will
drive up costs associated with achieving this new certification, which you
should call the "MS - Pay For Our Lawyers In Return For A Coupon -
Sweepstakes" The assumption here of course being that Microsoft is comprised
of humans, when it could be that their employees all come from WestWorld.
5. Aware of my impending analysis, self-importance, and now as they are now
possibly desperately trying to conceal the truth of this matter, Microsoft
has apparently exercised it's "right" to control the public by "asking" for
informational references to this future "improvement" to be removed.
Obviously, Doctor DNS has learned that it is potentially a bad endeavor to
represent anything Microsoft may not want you to say, because they have
lawyers with other pieces of paper that say they can take away your paper,
and they will make you fill out forms. Way to cave in, Doctor DNS!
6. Once you complete your MCSE, and plod forward to your MSCA, the next step
will be MSCB (announced just before you complete MSCB), MSCC (designed just
before your interview so you have to keep paying Microsoft in order to get a
job), MSCDA (Deluxe Architect, which will prove once and for all that you
paid Microsoft, and come with a hat), et al, and should you commit hordes of
money and time to Microsoft you may one day achieve your MS PDCC. Or, you
can save yourself some time, and just get MS SLAVE++ tatooed anywhere it can
be scanned. Once you've done all of this, you'll gain access to the top
secret cloning and gene therapy chamber at Microsoft that turns you into one
of the Men Who Look Like Kenny Rogers. All that for only $25,000!
Microcephalic S. Bob
DISCLAIMER: the opinions expressed herein are not the actual opinions of any
individual, and should not be considered as such. Neither I, nor the other
me, claim any responsibility for the content of this message whatsoever. In
fact, we can and will blame you for it in it's entirety unless you purchase
Microcephalic S. Bob's MCSE Fail & Blame service, which entitles you to fail
and blame me for it..