I didn't really appreciate having my computer rebooted the other day and
having changes to my configuration made without my consent. Microsoft has
overstepped it's bounds and even if the license agreement states that I have
agreed to this, I'm not required to be reasonable about it, or do anything
sane.
For those of you who don't know... A number of years ago, for no real
reason, Microsoft was kind enough to invite me in the doors and provide me
with a lot of information I probably shouldn't have. Access to their
computer network, intranet, old software. They even paid for my plane
ticket. I still don't know why. I never did anything for them. Even after
this, I was given more information by employees who didn't really have a
reason, either.
While I was there I printed over 600 pages of their internal documents,
drank sodas and milk, and talked to their employees about useless nonsense
and basically wasted people's time and money. I smiled and waved at the
security cameras. It was fun.
When I left I had one of their employees carry my bag because I said my arm
hurt... he even gave me a couple of extra sodas to take with me. I left the
documents on the printer, though. What am I going to do with a bunch of
paper?
Amongst this information, which I may be disclosing at some point in the
near future (whenever it suits my purposes and makes Microsoft look foolish
[because they are and people just haven't figured it out yet]), there were
lists of phone numbers to various Microsoft departments, names and email
addresses.
Just so you know... I'm going to be calling these people whenever I feel
like it, wasting their time, and using social engineering techniques to gain
more information about the company, which I will make public at my
discretion, or balloon into more time wasting and entertainment value. I'll
throw them a little bit of nonsense to make them think the wrong thing about
the projects they are working on, tell them that they need to report back to
headquarters, yell and scream about how they totally screwed up this or that
and then hang up. Maybe I'll tell them that their parents are dead or play
Beethoven over the phone.
Rest easy, folks, in this process, I won't violate the law or do anything
that Microsoft can retaliate against. And I've got plenty of time on my
hands and nothing better to do.
There's an alternative to all of this, of course, Microsoft could spare
themselves humiliation and lost revenue by granting one simple request on my
part. More details when I feel like it.
Microcephalic S. Bob
My powers are beyond your understanding.